Animal I Have Become
by TheEliteLabRatsLover
Summary: Oliver is contemplating the events of the day... Song Fic! Animal I have Become, by Three Days Grace. COLLAB with Night of the Cheshire! Might contain spoilers for Arrow Season 5, Episode "Kapiushon"


**Welcome back, ya'll! I'm doing another collab with the _awesome and super talented_ Night of the Cheshire, which, her stories are so freakin' good, so what are you waiting for!? Go check them out! You will _not_ regret it. ;) As always, I had a super fun time collabbing with you, and I look forward to when we do it again. ;) Now onto the story!**

 **Disclaimer: I own no part of this.**

* * *

 _I can't escape this hell_

 _So many times I've tried_

 _But I'm still caged inside_

 _Somebody get me through this nightmare_

 _I can't control myself_

Oliver blamed himself for everything that had happened. For Evelyn's betrayal, for the deaths of the people in this city. And being honest, a lot of them were. He walked back to the Cave, shirt in hand, and blood gushing from his wounds.

"My fault." He muttered under his breath. "I'm sorry Felicity. Thea. Roy. Rene. Curtis, Evelyn, Sara, Rory… Digg." His voice stopped in his chest, "Laurel."

He stumbled into the elevator, and rode it down, crying softly. He knew what he was doing, and yet, he'd killed all those people, bad or not, without a second thought. He heard Felicity talking when the doors opened and he stepped out.

 _So what if you can see the darkest side of me_

 _No one will ever change this animal I have become_

 _Help me believe it's not the real me_

 _Somebody help me tame this animal_

"Oliver's been gone for 6 days and- And what? Oliver? Oh, my God." She said, getting off her chair and walking over. Oliver dropped his bow and quiver on the ground. Everyone watched, waiting anxiously to see what he said next, as he slipped his jacket, covering his shoulders, off.

"Oliver?" Digg asked worriedly.

"Chase had me…" He said, wincing as he slid it off his arms. "And he let me go." Oliver finished, no one moved.

"Go slow man…" Digg approached Oliver, he waved a hand at Digg.

"It's over." Oliver grumbled.

"Oliver, we're gonna get this son of a bitch for whatever he did to you." Digg growled.

"John, It's-it-it-It's over for me… I don't wanna do this anymore. I'm shutting it all down." Oliver replied. Felicity looked at him, then ad Digg, who said nothing. Thoughts ran through all their heads.

Things like what made him do this, what happened to him, why he was acting this way… So many thoughts, but all are one. It's simply Oliver. He can't escape this Hell. He's an animal, a monster, a killer. And he's done with it.

 **(And that was the AMAZING Night of the Cheshire's part! Until our next collab! And I hope it's soon. ;))**

 _..._

 _I can't escape myself_

 _So many times I've lied_

 _But there's still rage inside_

 _Somebody get me through this nightmare_

 _..._

Oliver simply couldn't handle this anymore. It was a nightmare. And he was trapped in it. It was almost like someone, or some _thing_ , had been chasing him. Chasing him and taunting him, until...it finally caught up to him. And he became the animal that had once hunted him down.

...

 _I can't control myself_

 _So what if you can see the darkest side of me_

 _No one will ever change this animal I have become_

 _Help me believe it's not the real me_

 _..._

He couldn't control it anymore. He had to shut things down before those around him got hurt, or...or worse. Who was left around him, anyway. So many of his friends had already suffered enough. He had to stop it before things spiraled out of control. Felicity and Diggle had tried to tell him that he was wrong, but Oliver knew the truth.

And it was one of his greatest enemies that had made him realize. Prometheus had simply shown him the truth. The truth that he had known all along; he was an animal. A _monster_.

...

 _Somebody help me tame this animal_

 _Somebody help me through this nightmare_

 _I can't control myself_

 _Somebody wake me from this nightmare_

 _..._

Thea had found out about his shutting down the team. She had even tried to talk him out of it. _"Ollie, you can't just do this. I don't know what Prometheus put inside of your head, but he was_ wrong _. You don't...you don't actually believe anything he said, do you?"_

Her question made him wonder even now if he did believe him. If he was honest with himself, he _did_ believe Chase. Oliver _was_ an animal. He had killed all of those people, and he had _liked_ it. He was no better than any of his enemies.

...

 _I can't escape this hell_

 _So what if you can see the darkest side of me_

 _No one will ever change this animal I have become_

 _Help me believe it's not the real me_

 _Somebody help me tame this animal_

 _..._

So he's crying out, silent pleas tearing him down inside, begging to be let loose, along with all of his demons, but he's trying, and _God_ , does he try to keep the animal at bay. Because it is _hell_. And no matter how hard he tries, Oliver knows that he can never escape it. He's been outrunning this animal inside of him for so long, he'd forgotten what it was like to be _normal_. Perhaps he was never normal.

Maybe he's always been outrunning the monster that pursues him.

But being taken by Prometheus had worn him down. Chopped him down until there was nothing left but the raw, broken and tarnished soul that was his own. And so, he gives into the monster. Oliver finally stops running...and gives in.

He has finally, at last, become the animal that has hunted him since day one.

And there was _no_ turning back.

* * *

 **Ta-da! I had such an awesome time doing this. Thanks for always making collabbing fun, Dani. ;)**


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